By Jen Crowley
March 13, 2019
My husband and I were about four months in of actively trying to conceive when I went to my first doctor’s appointment for fertility issues. Most doctors will tell you that you need to wait at least one year before making an appointment like this; I imagine they probably won’t even see you about it until you reach this emotional prerequisite. I can’t even fathom what kind of emotional state I would’ve been in had we waited an entire year before addressing what clearly seemed to be a medical issue. Thank goodness for our fertility awareness through Natural Family Planning charting and for NaProTECHNOLOGY® doctors!
NFP is based on the fact that a woman’s body gives certain signs about the different phases of her monthly fertility cycle. It teaches you to observe and interpret these signs to determine when a woman is fertile, and because I had been doing this since before I got married to gain knowledge of my own body, I knew that there was a chance something could be wrong with my fertility. My husband and I knew the signs of my body that showed fertility, and we had been using them to try to achieve pregnancy for those four months. I had the additional knowledge of being aware of my family history of endometriosis, and my sister had just been diagnosed with it herself, so I wanted to get on the ball with treatment if it was discovered that I might also have it. It turns out that I do, along with having a few other issues.
Over the next several months, I went through surgery and several series of ultrasounds to watch my body ovulate (or not ovulate) and began addressing some hormonal issues that were contributing to my struggle with fertility issues. All the while, I witnessed several loved ones become pregnant and, although I was thankful for the little gifts of life with which they had been blessed, my heart ached for a child of my own and I began to feel very alone in my struggle.
I had befriended Cari Henry, MD, at church and felt a connection with her, so much so that I opened up to her about the emotional rollercoaster I had been on with my trying to conceive. I desperately needed someone to talk to and Cari happened to be that caring and compassionate ear that God so kindly gave to me. While Cari had never personally experienced the burden of infertility, she had witnessed its pain through patients she treated when she practiced Family Medicine years before. Her understanding of Theology of the Body and knowledge of fertility from being a FertilityCare™ Practitioner made her an even better person to talk to about my struggle.
She and I soon came to the realization that the Church needed to offer a ministry for couples struggling with infertility. I couldn’t find much to help me and my husband spiritually on this infertility journey we begrudgingly found ourselves on. I ran across a couple of articles and blog posts about support from the Church but there was certainly nothing local to provide that connection I so badly desired.
I didn’t feel comfortable attending the “secular” infertility support groups in town since, as a Catholic, I have a different understanding of reproductive technology and God’s plan for creating the precious gift of human life. I knew that my participation in the existing “secular” infertility support groups would not bring me affirmation, encouragement or support in my family building journey, so I chose not to even try visiting any of those groups.
Since we couldn’t seem to find any good options for spiritual support, Cari and I decided to follow what seemed to be our calling to build our own ministry. So Sarah’s Hope & Abraham’s Promise was born.
The ministry that started just as a weekly support group and spiritual study meeting has grown to include services not only for couples struggling with infertility, but also for couples that experience pregnancy loss and for families that have been built by adoption. We wish to help couples reclaim hope, joy and, ultimately, fruitfulness. Programs we offer include support group meetings, prayer services and retreats. We closely support couples at the beginning of their realization of fertility issues, celebrate with those whose families grow through conception or adoption, and pray for and with couples that find themselves struggling emotionally and spiritually in their fertility journey.
Infertility is not an easy road to travel. Our prayer is that Sarah’s Hope & Abraham’s Promise will bring couples hope, comfort and encouragement as they courageously deny themselves and take up their crosses of infertility and / or pregnancy loss. We wish to travel along with them on their journeys and bring the love of the Father, promise of the Son and peace of the Holy Spirit to them.
Please pray for our ministry and for all those organizations that serve couples struggling with infertility and / or pregnancy loss as well as those organizations that serve adoptive families. May we glorify God with our lives and service, and may every purpose Our Lord has for this ministry be fulfilled.
Our Lady of Guadalupe, pray for us!
Hey! I’m Jen Crowley!
I helped co-found the ministry Sarah’s Hope & Abraham’s Promise, where we seek to offer spiritual support for those struggling with infertility or pregnancy loss, as well as support for those touched by adoption. I’ve been the proud wife to a great man for over 10 years, and I’ve been blessed through the miracle of adoption to be a mama of four beautiful (and very active) children! I come from the South and love cooking, a glass (or two) of wine, and Jesus. Throw in a movie marathon coupled with snuggles with my kiddos or deep conversations with my dearest loved ones, and you couldn’t find me happier! You can find my humble thoughts on journeying through infertility and adoption here!
